Your married friends will eagerly help you write your profile and, in return, you will provide them much-needed vicarious thrills. Men who haven't been in the parenting trenches, even if they love kids, just seem to speak a different language, one that doesn't necessarily have a translation for phrases such as, "I can't leave my son with a babysitter tonight because he has the flu."On the other hand, dating a man with kids can be a scheduling nightmare, requiring both of you to synchronize with your exes and their new love interests, and the new love interests' exes, ad infinitum.
One minute I was dancing around the living room singing "Do you believe in life after love?Older kids' reactions could run the gamut from very threatened to seemingly indifferent.My friend Kristin Cole, who lives in Montclair, New Jersey, recalls that her 10-year-old announced that he was going to say "I hate you! What really happened is that they tossed a football around in the yard and ended up becoming pretty chummy.But they're girls and I'm their mom, so it was a whole different thing.My older daughter was not cool with my even mentioning my boyfriend and announced that she refused to meet him.When I was young and looked at people whose age I am now, I often wondered if their perception of themselves changed when they looked in the mirror, or if they still had the young mind in an older body.
Several months after my husband and I separated, it finally occurred to me that I was free to date. The last time I'd been single, I'd had copious amounts of free time, was beholden to no one, and believed in love.
"Non-dads tend to be able to work better with the crazy schedule of a single mom," she says. If it works with someone, it works, dad-ness be damned. I was dating a guy for a couple of months when my girls, then 8 and 12, got wind of his existence.
When Is the Right Time and What Is the Right Way to Introduce a Guy I'm Dating to My Kids? Because their dad had already introduced them to his girlfriend and everything went fine, I figured they wouldn't give me a hard time.
Trying to simultaneously be a hot mama and an uber-responsible single parent was a challenge to my schedule and my psyche, but I learned that you can, in fact, have a romantic life without freaking out your kids (or yourself).
I've been at it for three-plus years now, so let me take a stab at what I suspect are your most pressing questions--they were surely mine. I know people who waited years before deciding to take the plunge and some who threw themselves into it instantly. If there's another parent in the picture and you share custody, you will suddenly have something called free time, which you may remember from your pre-mom days.
Now, however, I had 16 years of marriage and 11 years of motherhood under my belt, plus a less-than-starry-eyed attitude about romance.